Long ends, short ends

People doing their best might still get the short end of the stick. That's the harsh reality of life. No fundamental sets of laws ensure that good will come back to you if you do good. You do not have any control over what happens to you, the only thing you can influence is how you react to the things that happen to you. Most of us do not come to this realisation until something big happens to us, like losing someone or seeing someone at their final stages in life. 

On a day-to-day basis, we live as if we had all the time in the world. The truth is, we don't. Our individual existence is just so insignificant on the grand scale of things. I sometimes find myself getting caught up in the smallest issues that do not matter, worrying out things that do not matter, too stuck in my head to live life. Life happens now and I will never ever get back these moments. Time is precious, and overthinking every single step is not healthy but at the same time, making sudden decisions with no proper plan is not sustainable either. Taking a leap of faith and believing in the best possible outcome is naive and quite a gamble.

Time is too precious to feel miserable every day. Lately, I've been feeling like I've been paralysed, genuinely overwhelmed with just living. Days are blending in, and weeks go by and I am just going through my days, waking up, going to bed and waiting to have a reason to get out of bed like I used to. Whilst the fact that I get to wake up every day and experience the little things should be enough because I am healthy, I have everything that I need for survival, I have received the long end of the stick and am so aware of it, yet it seems like I cannot appreciate it, acknowledge it enough. I suppose once you get to this stage, where you do not need to care about any of your physiological needs, you need a sense of purpose. 

Whatever, be grateful for the smallest things because you never know if you'll receive the short end of the stick at some point in time. I hope you won't but who knows, you're not in charge.